Do Your Friendships Feed Your Soul?

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Photo courtesy of thedailyquotes.com

A lot has been going on for me the last few months regarding closing the doors on some friendships in my life.

There has been a lot of back and forth over a few friendships, and there has been a few where I am certain they need to go. I set a date for after Christmas as not to be a super Grinch so that I could remove them after the holiday just to do it as nicely as possible. While the doors may have shut on those relationships, I don’t plan on being inconsiderate on how I end things. I will just quietly remove them from Facebook and if they contact me about it I will explain why they were removed as honestly but kindly as possible.

I watched a video just this morning on deciding when some friendships deserve a second chance. There are a couple I’ve wavered over because there was a lot of good I saw in those people and/or those friendships. I had seen some things over the last few years that bothered me, but more recently as I’ve grown and matured, it’s been an issue for me as I feel we are growing apart in many ways. I’m still stuck on what to do with them because I still feel back and forth over it. I’ve made no certain decisions over them yet because of that.

One friend and I have just grown apart in many ways. She is on a different level with life choices and behavior that I am not on. I’ve grown and moved past a lot of things that she has not. I see a lot of potential in her and I know she’s a good person in many ways. Yet I also see she is still stuck in a lot of immature behavior that I have no interest in. That doesn’t mean she is a horrible person, it simply means we are in different places in our lives, and I handle things in a different way.

She did not handle an issue well recently, and then flipped out on me over it…. It was the classic, “I blame you because I cannot see any faults in my behavior” defensive response so many folks do. I saw it for what it was and tried to address the actual issue in a way that hopefully might get through to her. I did not let her suck me into drama, arguing, blaming or fighting. I’m just not getting into that. It’s a waste of energy and time.

I was very thankful for the growth I’ve done because I was able to see her actions for what they were and how she was deflecting. I was able to respond with that in mind rather than getting sucked into an argument because I reacted based on only what she said. I truly hope at some point she is able to see things in that light as well! She is a very smart lady. I don’t feel she always has the best influences in her life who encourage personal growth and maturity, and I truly believe having influence that do makes a world of difference. I think she deserves good friends who lift her up, discourage negative behavior, and help bring out the best in her!

Despite that issue, I still see good in her and the friendship. I feel like there might be potential for a second chance for a friendship at some point. However, right now I don’t think that is something that will happen. Time has passed and we haven’t spoken since the disagreement. Nothing has changed or moved forward toward repair. It’s unfortunate but that is just the situation at the moment. I fully believe in setting healthy boundaries in your life and standing by them when others try to break them. One of the things that I did not appreciate from her was comments attacking me for sharing on Facebook that I was setting healthy boundaries for myself and was weeding out those who did not respect them. It is never okay to attack a person for setting healthy boundaries! They are much needed! And again, this is something she said because of the place she’s in, not because of me.

I don’t take removing friends from my life lightly in any way. It is necessary at times though. This is an unfortunate fact of life we will face many times in our lives. These are toxic people who you need to have the courage to walk away from completely. They are only harming you and those you interact with. I hope that my friend, and everyone else out there, will find that courage for themselves so they can remove the influences that hurt their lives. Those people will drain you and suck the life out of you. You CANNOT move onward to better things if you are keeping yourself stuck in a circle of negativity!

I will continue to think on the friendships I have that I am uncertain about. It’s always best to put a lot of time, thought, care, and consideration into major decisions with those you care deeply about. As for the folks I’ve had to part ways with, I am truly thankful for the good memories we shared and the bits of good they put into my life – no matter how small! They came into my life for a reason and I appreciate that fact. I wish them the best in life and I truly hope each person is able to be their best one day! I don’t wish ill will on them, but that doesn’t mean they have a place in my life. Some relationships just are not meant to be.

Today I hope that each one of you who reads this finds a circle of amazing people who help you be your very best! You each deserve a circle of people who do good in your life and who aren’t a negative drain on you! I want you all to find those people and hold out for them in your life!

If I don’t talk to you tomorrow, have a very wonderful Christmas to all of you who celebrate it!! ❤❤❤

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The Sound of Closing Doors

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Do you ever feel like doors to a path in life are closing for you? Sometimes you see it coming, sometimes it is very unexpected. I’m there right now. I’ve spent most of my life working with children. Even when I was one, I was babysitting and tutoring. I spent my life working with kids on and off in one way or another. After I had Little Divine 10 and a half years ago, I tried to go to work away from her. I was a single mom, my mother had dumped me in this state when she was supposed to take us with her so I could finish school and work from home doing Medical Transcription. Since she failed to do that, I ended up taking a retail job and putting my newborn in daycare. It was an absolutely shitty position to be in and I cried every single day. There are no nice words to express the place I was put in. It was miserable. :/

Thankfully a girl at the daycare recommend I just apply for a job there. I had past childcare experience so I went for it and I got hired. I spent the next 4 years working in daycare. It had a lot of rewards but I was at a place that took advantage of the hard workers and mistreated a lot of employees. They ended up dealing with a lot of legal issues for many years after that because of their lack of respect for the rules and for human beings.

After I left the daycare, I decided to do home childcare. From 2011 till 2016 I worked from home watching children. I’ve seen so many kiddos grow up in those years! I’ve been blessed to be a part of each one of their lives. ❤ There were both good and bad moments. Many times I struggled to bring in enough income. I live in a very low income state so it was hard to get paid well doing childcare. Yet with a little one of my own, other work wasn’t an option since I also couldn’t afford childcare on the pay I could get from jobs I would qualify for.

We had years of good pay and years of struggling. But we stuck with it through it all because I loved what I did and it gave me the freedom to stay home with Little Divine and see her grow. There is nothing I would trade for those moments! I got to see all of her firsts and I got to be there for everything. As a single parent, that is very rare!

The last two years I mostly worked with one kiddo. He had a lot of behavioral issues and was asked to leave his preschool. We had a hard time with his family as his dad was a jerk, plain and simple, and his parents were split up so we were often put in the middle of bad situations. Dad complained all the time about paying me, despite the fact that I discounted my rates for them and I was barely making it off the pay. They would constantly change their schedules and hours last minute, often giving me zero notice. They didn’t want to pay cancellation fees or deal with paying for last minute schedule changes. I often got different stories and times from each parent. All their instability created extra issues for their son who did not need any of that.

When I sent him off to kindergarten this past August I was exhausted. They had sucked all the joy out of childcare for me. They drained me completely. The idea of watching kids exhausted me. I decided to take a break for a bit. We had tons of stuff left over to sell from my resale business and I was making my $2 fashion earrings that seemed to sell well. I had saved up a bit over the last couple of months because I had a feeling I would need a break. I just didn’t have anything left to give after that.

Since then I feel like the doors to childcare are closing for me. I don’t know if it’s because we haven’t found the right family yet or if it’s because I am meant to do something else. I have been applying for jobs on Care.com weekly but so far no go on any of the ones I feel would work for us.

I got another message today telling me they found someone else. I keep feeling like I’m supposed to focus elsewhere. A few weeks ago I took my jewelry making to a new level and started making higher cost sets that people seem to really love. Apparently I have a really good eye for it and I’ve been told I’m great at my craft! For someone new to it, that’s a huge compliment! ❤

Maybe this is what I’m supposed to do instead. I honestly don’t know. I wish life came with clear signs in the direction you should take! Instead I am working on selling off all the resale items left and everything we don’t need  in the house. Little Divine has been bringing down hoards of toys from her room for me to sell as she’s getting older and is weeding out what she doesn’t use. We have a small income coming in from that and now I’m  slowly selling jewelry sets. Eventually I want to work on refinishing furniture too. And I am working on my photo editing and photography work.

I’ve always felt my creative pursuits benefit me the most and I really, REALLY love doing work involving them! Maybe this is why the doors to what I’ve done just to make it through the last few years keep closing. Maybe it’s time to find something new that I truly love. Mr. Divine tells me often that he wants me to find something I love to do. I love him for so many reasons but that is one of them. He doesn’t care if I make millions. He wants me to do what I love and succeed at it!

So I start off the holiday weekend with hope for my jewelry business to bloom into more, and more new doors to open for my life! I have hope for the next year to bring more joy and more happiness in whatever work I do. I look forward to seeing what doors will open as these ones close. I’m very excited to see what happens! ❤

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Pay The Blessings Forward

Today was a special day for me. I received a message from the woman who purchased a jewelry set from me this weekend. It was the first set I had sold on Etsy before and she asked me to get it to her before Christmas. I got it ready on Saturday and shipped it out. Before mailing it, I added an extra little pair of earrings with it because I believe in doing a little something nice with every order. It’s my way of saying, “Thank you!” to each person who has supported my business. I adore my customers and I love them for seeing the value in what we make! ❤

This sweet customer wrote me today, telling me that the extra earrings I sent had more meaning than I knew. She had lost a dear friend a few years back and the earrings were the same symbol as she had for the person she lost. I cried when I read her message! I had no idea when I picked them out for her package, they just seemed to be the right fit. And I ended up blessing her by that gesture and doing something special for her.

Folks this is a reminder to pay things forward. Little bits of kindness no matter how small can change someone’s whole day. They can bless their lives in a way you can’t imagine. You may think it’s not much, but to someone else it could mean the whole world. ❤

Life is hard and ugly. Anything that we can do to make it a little less so is so vital. Hold doors open for people. Help elderly folks take out their groceries. Pay for the person’s food behind you at the fast food place. Send an extra gift to someone for no reason. Smile at cashiers and tell them thank you for their hard work. Anything you can do to put more good in the world for others!

I got nothing out of this experience today other than a blessed heart and happiness. I don’t do any of these things expecting gains in return. I do it because life is hard and ugly. And so many times I didn’t have any kindness in my world when I could have used it. So I do it for others because I want to be the person I needed through my hard times. I want to be the good I didn’t have around me when things were dark.

The quote, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” from Mahatma Gandhi is monumental. All the times you look back on your life with sadness or bitterness, because you needed something that you didn’t get, those are the things to do now for others. You know how it feels to desperately need some show of kindness or love. Do that for others. Be that person who lights up someone’s day by a simple gesture. Do it because it builds who you are up as a person and it blesses you because you blessed someone else.

My first sale on Etsy will be something I always remember because of this special moment! I did something to bless another person and I didn’t even know I was doing it! It changed everything about this sale and made it all the more special to me. I couldn’t have asked for anything better! ❤

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Motivational Monday – Work For Your Dreams

On Saturday morning Mr. Divine and I got up and Little Divine wasn’t up yet. I made us coffee and we both sat down at our desks. Our desks are side by side (so sweet!) and we often do games together so it’s nice to be nearby. I always check my email in the morning and check Facebook for sales, etc. One of my favorite people right now is Jamie Primak Sullivan, author of The Southern Education of a Jersey Girl. I listen to her morning videos and check out the inspirational and motivational stuff she shares on her Facebook page. She’s been a huge reminder to me that there ARE good quality people out there, you just have to be patient and not accept crappy people in your life until you find them.

This weekend her video was about, “Why not you?” and she talked about how there’s no reason you can’t be the one to have your dreams. I really felt it hit home with me because I’ve been going through a lot of self-doubt lately with putting childcare on the back burner and trying to focus more on making jewelry and photos. It’s very scary to take a leap into something new when you aren’t sure what will happen! Plus I had several friends who were supposed to support me or who had ordered items from me that ended up flaking and letting me down. Not only did that hurt me as a person, but it hurt my business.

I got a lot from watching her video and it reminded me that I CAN succeed in my dream if I keep at it and I can keep confidence in it. I think the big thing we need to remember is that our dreams can’t happen while we sit on the couch dreaming them. We have to be fully committed to MAKING them happen, and that takes work! You can to put yourself behind what you are doing 100% and put in the effort to accomplish it. I think that’s where a lot of people lose their vision, because there is so much work involved.

Everything in life takes work. This is something we teach Little Divine constantly because we don’t want her to have the mentality of so many others out there who don’t want to put in any effort for anything. Life takes hard work! You don’t get where you are going by not doing hard work. Anything good in life will take lots of hard work. And the rewards from it will be totally worth it!

I sat at my desk next to Mr. Divine and he heard the theme of the video I was listening too. He asked me if I had seen the Shia Labeouf motivational video, which I had not. Let me tell you, it’s a hoot! Shia is a *unique* character. His motivational video is him in front of a green screen, screaming at you to just do what you need to do. I have to say, as silly as his video was, it definitely can be a good motivator! Having something tell you to, “JUST DO IT!!!” has a way of getting your blood pumping to get something done!

Taking what I got from both videos, I walked away with a renewed sense to make my dreams happen. I am really good at making beautiful jewelry pieces. I walk into a store, I look at the pieces, and I can make something gorgeous out of them. I’m excited to get even more detailed in my work and use bead necklaces I’ve made as well. I’m excited to see what wonderful creations I can come up with!

Everyone comment I’ve had on my sets so far has been how beautiful, gorgeous or stunning they are. That says A LOT. I am not saying this to brag in any way. I am saying this to make a point. Clearly I have something here. Clearly I am doing something right. Clearly I am doing something that catches the eye of others. I need to take that and run with it!

As I am sitting at my desk, discussing this with Mr. Divine, and setting my resolve to make my little business bloom, an email comes in. It is a lady messaging me on Etsy asking if she can pay extra to get one of my jewelry sets rush mailed to her! I wrote her back, offering to ship it out priority 2-3 day mail at not extra cost. She was thrilled, and paid for the set immediately!

Yes, that was my first ever jewelry set sale on Etsy! I cannot express in words how excited I was! I may have also cried a little. I have sold one set locally and one set on Etsy. I’ve been making these sets for 2 weeks. Just TWO WEEKS. And I’ve sold two! Maybe that doesn’t seem like a lot to some folks, but to me that bodes very well!

Successful people did not give up on their dreams. They did not quit when things got hard, or their plans weren’t going right. They kept at it. They kept their eye on the prize. They continued to work hard and deal with bumps in the road. You cannot achieve success by quitting. You cannot achieve success without doing the work. Your dreams are very much worth it! You should be able to live your dreams and make them happen! Please don’t quit on them!

Today, take the time to ask yourself what you really want in life and what you can do to make it happen. Then work at it! Don’t expect overnight changes or success. Be prepared to do a lot of hard work for a while. But don’t give up! Remember that you have people like me who support you in chasing your dreams, and who want you to succeed! Every dream, big or small, is worth it! It is worth chasing after, it is worth doing the work for, it is worth having! ❤

I am going to the store today to get pieces for a new set to make and sell. I made a deal with myself when I started this that if I sell a set, I turn right around and use some of the money from it to make a new set right away. This way I always have a good inventory available and can keep pushing sales. If you are interested, feel free to check out what I’m creating on my Etsy Shop or my Facebook page!

One major update in the next few weeks will have to be a camera. My pieces are so pretty but my phone is just not capturing the detail and the beauty enough. I think a big part of that is that it can’t zoom and the photo quality it takes. So keep an eye out for even better pics to come!

Have a wonderful and successful week every single one of you! ❤

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You And I Deserve To Be Respected

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Today I am going to talk about respect. Respect is vital to our lives and it is important that those in your life and in your circle respect you, as you should respect them. When there is a lack of respect for one another, there is a serious issue that needs to be looked at.

The quote above blew me away today. I went online looking for a simple quote graphic with just the last sentence and I found this one as well. It really knocked me back because it took the last sentence so much further and really pushed me to think a lot harder on what I’ve been allowing my life. I am a giver. I care and I like to do what I can for others. Yet time and time again I’ve found myself on the end of a friendship that involves me being taken and taken and taken from, with very little to nothing put back in. I end up getting used or taken advantage of, and sucked dry emotionally.

The last few months have really been an eye opener for me regarding the kind of people I’ve had around me and how much they don’t fit well in my life anymore. One of the main things that has stood out to me is how poorly the majority of them have treated me. Yet I’ve kept these friendships going because I see good in these people. Reading that picture above today really hit me hard today because it is a clear explanation of why I’ve ended up stuck in bad friendships with people who don’t respect me.

Simply put – It’s happened because I allowed it to.

Yes, that is a huge responsibility taking statement right there! I have been treated poorly time and time again because I haven’t cut it off and walked away. I have stuck around, seeing the good in a person, and hoped they would change. Yet the evidence has been 100% showing that they will not!

With all the changes in my life and this new place I am in, I am ready to let go and move on. Respect is something I deeply value and I get so little of it from those I know right now. It’s extremely saddening to me that I am valued SO little by these people! They have made that VERY clear in their actions over the last months and years. And I know that as a human being I deserve better. We all do!

That means getting up the gumption to walk away and cut ties. That’s the hardest part for me. Can you believe that I actually feel GUILTY for cutting these awful people out of my life?! I do! I seriously feel like a bad person for giving up on them, despite the fact that I mean zero to them and they gave up on me a long time ago. I shouldn’t feel guilty and neither should you! People who treat you like garbage and bring negativity into your world need to GO!! No guilt! Open the door for healthy people who bring positivity and good into your world to come into your life instead!

I know I will feel bad after I remove these people. And then I will remind myself that there was a very good reason each person was removed and I will stop feeling bad. I deserve to have a circle of people who encourage me, support me, keep their word, bring positivity in my world, are there for me, and who want the best for me. I am happy waiting to find people like that as time goes on! I’d rather have zero friends and be in a good place. Because fake friends who treat you like garbage and disrespect you will only hurt you. Don’t keep them around until you find better friends. Who you surround yourself with will affect your life. It will affect what people you attract in life. You need to let the toxic people go.

I can hear Elsa singing in the background right now, “Let it go! Let it go!” This needs to be our mantra in life. If something is not good for you and it bring negativity and toxicity into your life, LET IT GO! You have to make space for the good in life and the people who bring good into your world. You have to say goodbye to old friends you’ve had for many, many years who eat away at your heart and soul. You have to put yourself and your well-being first.

You have to let them go from your life.

You can do this.

I will be waiting until after Christmas as to not be a totally heartless ass. Then my Facebook page gets a beautiful purging! I am so excited! It gives me SO much freedom and hope to remove people from my life who do not belong in it! I know I am opening the doors to much better people and situations! I am looking forward to a new year with a very, VERY small friends list on Facebook and in real life.

2017 will be the year of NEW!

You can make that happen for you too! (^.^) You are worth having good people around! ❤

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Greedy Looks Ugly On You

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Photo courtesy of http://quotes.lifehack.org

It’s that time of morning again. The time when I’m up early doing my thing online, and being disgusted by what I see. Today I’ll be talking about greed and bragging. Oh boy!

I am a small business owner. I run my own childcare business on and off, though after the last 2 years of working with a family I’ve been taking time off to do resale and work on my jewelry business. You can find a lot of my work on my Etsy shop or on my Facebook page. (No shame in a little self promotion here!) I think small businesses are important and we should support those who have a small business because you support the people who have a family rather than a large company. I shop through small businesses as much as possible, even people who sell through companies like Avon and such, because you are still supporting the person’s work even though they didn’t hand make their product.

One lady contacted me a while back and we ran into each other at a fun event for families. I thought she seemed nice and she sent me a friend request on Facebook. We haven’t really chatted much other than about doing local craft shows for my jewelry because that may be a good way to get my business the jump start it needs and to sell a bunch of stuff at a time. She sells through a direct sales company, and I thought it would be nice to order a few things from her here and there. Mind you, she’s never once asked about my items. I like to put out the good even if others don’t. Be the example you want to see in the world! ❤

I got on Facebook the other day, and there is a post from her showing off a brand new SUV. We’re talking right off the dealership lot. And she’s saying in the post, “I was really good this year.” Right off the bat I’m bothered. I don’t think bragging is classy by any means. I don’t think rubbing your wealth in the faces of others is considerate or tactful behavior. We no longer live in a day and age where people think before they act or keep anything to themselves. It’s all just verbal-diarrhea all over their social media pages. To get old fashioned – it’s very uncouth.

We need to be taking a step back and realizing that some things are not meant to be shared on social media. We need to keep things to ourselves or among close family and friends, shared person to person.  Personal issues and relationship issues shouldn’t be broadcasted online. We shouldn’t be throwing our spouses and partners under the bus online in front of everyone and their dog. Some thing should not be posted on a public forum.

Like a brand new car. And the comment typed with it was not very flattering either. On top of that, many people commented on the picture saying she JUST got a new car last year….. Her only reply? I was a really good girl this year. (o.O) Wow. So tacky it hurts.

As a possible customer she lost all of my business in that moment. I will not be ordering from her at all at any point. Why? She clearly does not need the money. And she boasts online, making others feel bad. I watched the comments and saw many folks saying things like, “It must be nice to buy a new car every year!” We live in a very low income state. To boldly throw your wealth in the faces of others who are struggling, especially around the holiday season, is disrespectful. I wouldn’t be surprised if less folks order from her after that. I sure will not. I don’t support that kind of behavior.

Greed and bragging look ugly no matter who does it. I make it a point to not brag about anything in my life other than saying my life is good! I do occasionally say how amazing Mr. Divine is, but not to a point that is intentionally trying to rub it in the face of others. I feel this woman was very out of line in her post and her behavior. I don’t feel it was a professional or classy move. As a business person, it was not a very wise move. It just did not make her look good at all.

And it’s not the first time I’ve seen it. I had some former friends who felt the need to post pictures of every gift they got for birthdays and Christmas, almost in a way to shame those who didn’t get them things or didn’t get them as nice of things as they wanted. They often tagged people in posts with items listed they wanted, telling those people to buy those items for them! Just up front, “Buy this for me!” Hello greed! You sure are looking greedy today.

Life is full of wonderful things that we want to talk about. There is nothing wrong with that if your intentions are innocent and you are considerate in how you go about it. When you blatantly brag, shame others, and ask for things – that is an issue. It is unflattering and it isn’t the way adults should act. What example do we set for our children by telling them not to brag or be greedy, and then turning around and doing just that??

We need to get back to a place of thinking before we act. T.H.I.N.K. Is it True? Is it Helpful? Is it Inspiring? Is it Necessary? Is it Kind? This saying is printed out and hung on our wall in our living room for a reason. Because I follow what I teach. I want my WHOLE family to focus on making good choices all around. I want us all to strive to be the best people possible each day.

If we all took the time to do just a little bit better each day, the world would be a much better place! ❤

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Why My Family Comes First

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I see a lot of families everywhere I go. There are many, many types of families. I love how unique and individual each family unit is. Every family is something special and different. That’s what makes a family a family – unique structure and bond created to best suit the members in it.

I am pretty sure Facebook has become the place for inspiration for a lot of writings, though most are not positive inspirations. It has become a very negative and toxic environment. What used to be a place to share and celebrate life with those you know turned into a cesspool of hate, anger, and inappropriate behavior. I rarely go on Facebook anymore unless it is to list items to sell. Even my own personal feed is filled with garbage I don’t want to see.

I’ve had old friends make comments to me about how I spend all my time with Mr. Divine and Little Divine now, how I don’t make time for anyone else. I’ve had people invite me to Girls Night Out events and get mad when I don’t go. Or they make remarks how we are always together as a family.

I see nothing wrong with this. In fact, I see an issue with the fact that those people need to get away from their families. That is a big issue that needs to addressed. The wives who need a Girls Night Out to drink and bitch about everything are not for me. I am happy with my life and my relationship. If I have an issue in my relationship I address it with Mr. Divine. I don’t blast it on Facebook or trash talk him to everyone I know. That’s disrespectful. Yet I see women doing this all the time on Facebook.

Just as there are women flirting with other men, posting sexed up selfies, and putting their husbands down on a public social media forum. It’s embarrassing. It baffles me how 5 posts later they are complaining their husbands don’t listen to their needs. My advice is to stop flirting with every male human being you see, put your boobs away, and start focusing on your marriage. Why in the world would your husband respect you or put any of your needs first when you behave that way??

In life you should be daily trying to better yourself and your world. You should be working to be the best you possible and the best mom/dad/sister/brother/son/daughter/etc. you can be. Our family works together to make our family unit as healthy and happy as possible. No one person makes all the decisions, no one person’s needs come first, no one person is more important than the rest.  We all contribute and all put the others in our family as a priority.

Family values are on the decline in a big way. I see it daily and it saddens me. We need to be focused on putting our families first and fixing them. They are a priority and they set the example for our children on what life is supposed to be like. Our kids need healthy households and healthy examples.

This is why my family comes first. This is why I do so much with my family. This is why I don’t do Girls Night Out or bar nights with friends. That’s a single girl’s game. I absolutely have time for friends who act like adults and put their own families first. We have some really great friends who we spend time with monthly, some months weekly. They are great people who set a good example for their children and who are enjoyable to be around. They don’t behave like spoiled children wanting to live like they are single while they are in a marriage and have children to raise. They are the kind of people I want around my daughter.

As kids get older they can see the kind of people adults spend their time with. I want to Little Divine to see that we are making good choices on friends. I’ve had to back off from several friends in the last few months due to this. She is old enough to understand what is going on in a lot of situations and that has led to a lot of discussions in recent months. It’s made me think long and hard about who I keep around as a friend!

I love my family and I love being with them. We truly enjoy spending time together no matter what we are doing. They are great people who bring so much good into my life. They give me joy and make me laugh. They are fun to talk to and share experiences with. I love both Little Divine and Mr. Divine. I’m really lucky because Mr. Divine is my best friend and I get to share everything with him. I would not want life any other way. I am truly blessed to share life with them!

The next time someone tries to guilt you for not wanting to go out and drink and bash your husband, tell them NO with no guilt at all! Those of you out there who are putting your family first and are trying to build a strong foundation – kudos to you! What you are doing is amazing and it is something to be proud of. People are not making good choices on a daily basis in our current culture. Putting your family first and trying to be the best you can be is admirable.

Don’t ever feel guilty for putting your family first! ❤

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I Am Thankful

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Photo courtesy of thequotepedia.com

I generally start my mornings off the same way. I get up when Mr. Divine gets up for work, pack a lunch for him, and see him off. After that I get a fresh pot of coffee going for myself and check emails. I’ll spend my morning checking the Facebook page for my small business and the other sites I sell on. After I check that I will scroll down regular Facebook to see if there’s anything interesting going on or any good sales on pages I follow. Sometimes I find neat homeschooling info or a new book list for kids. I use Facebook as place for resources and helpful information.

Sadly, Facebook is generally not that kind of place.

Every morning for the last month I’ve spent a little extra time looking at what people I know post. It’s not the most positive stuff. Some of it is downright negative and toxic.

I am really blessed to have the life I do, but I didn’t stumble into good fortune. I spent my whole life picking up the pieces after the world broke me and after I made poor decisions. I worked extremely hard in my life to better myself and my world, for myself and for Little Divine. I waited patiently to meet the right person and didn’t jump into a poor choice just to avoid being along. I waited and I worked. And I stuck with it.

Finally it paid off.

I met Mr. Divine and we have become a family. We’ve spent every day working to improve our family and be the best we can together and for each other. We put each person as a priority,  none more so than anyone else, and that keeps us all striving to do our best for each other. Everyone’s needs get met because of this. Make no mistake – it is not always easy. We’ve had a lot of ups and downs. That’s life.

But we never give up. We keep working. We keep committed to making our family work. We never lose focus of the love we share.

I scroll past posts on Facebook from wives who are clearly bitter and angry at their spouses. Posts talking about how important it is for men to do this, and how really good men do that. A few posts later I see those same wives posting sexy pictures of themselves to get compliments from men who are not their husband…. Flirting left and right every chance they get….

In one family neither adult has worked in years, and they haven’t been spending their money on bills. Now they are in huge financial debt and asking people to give them free money and items…. They are taking advantage of the kindness of others and it’s not the first time they’ve gotten in this situation….

Another person is a parent and is always posting hateful and threatening things towards others. They constantly post embarrassing things bashing others and looking extremely immature, always wondering why people block them on Facebook….

Then there are the posts from people showing off all of their stuff. Look how much stuff they have. They brag about everything from rings to houses to cars to clothes to everything. A lot of them are wives who do not work and are bragging about what their husband’s money paid for….

In the cosplay group I’m in I constantly see posts from women trying to get men to like their page, desperate for any and all attention, doing whatever they can to get it even if it means lying and looking ridiculous. I don’t know what is missing from their lives but something clearly is.

What it comes down to is negativity and unhealthiness. I see it DAILY. I cannot get through my Facebook feed without it. It’s become a daily game of hide the post for me. I just have no interest in it.

I didn’t get where I am by wallowing in negativity or by continuing to make poor decision after poor decision. I got here by perseverance and hard work. I got here by a lot of hard work and sacrifice.

My life didn’t magically turn into a fairy tale. I have spent  my whole life working to get my life where it is now. I am in a very good place because I fought to make it so. I spent years working on bettering myself daily. I worked hard in life to get where I am. I waited patiently to find the right man and I work daily on our relationship. I respect him and I treat him how I want to be treated. I left immature behavior behind and moved forward to be a successful adult. I focused on building up my family first and making sure we are all thriving together.

I work daily for my life. I work daily for my family. I work daily for my relationship. I work daily for my business goals. I work daily to create an amazing present and an even better future.

If I didn’t use Facebook for my business I wouldn’t be on it at all. It is a very toxic place. People do not use common sense. There is no thinking before posting. There is no consideration of the embarrassment and disrespect they could cause their family and the people who know them.

While I scroll past post after post that makes me shake my head, I am even more thankful for my life. I’m thankful for the adult I’ve become and I really hope that who I am now makes my parents proud. I’m thankful for the life I built and where it’s headed in the future. I’m thankful to have Mr. Divine and Little Divine to share my life with. I’m thankful for every thing about my life.

I choose to use the negativity I see to remind me just how blessed I am. I want to stay grateful for each and every thing, no matter how small. It helps keep me focused on all the good in my life and keeps me striving to make my life good.

Today I am grateful for the love I share with my family. We have an amazingly strong bond that makes my heart melt. We love being together and we love each other. I am truly grateful to have that!

What are you grateful for today?

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